At what age do people feel the desire to start a family and to have kids?Just the other day I came across a wonderful meme.
It said, "Why is my kid asking how to relieve boredom? It's as if a person standing in front of a sink full of dishes has the best ideas".
Yes, it's funny and it's sad at the same time.
The answer to your question is - none.
There is no age when we collectively get those yearnings for family and kids.
There is no age when our biological clocks just make us stop all we're doing and go get kids (either our own or adoptive ones).
And there is no crystal ball for your future, so no one will tell you if you will have that desire to have kids.
Having kids is not mandatory - there is no kid police who will judge your worth based on number of heirs and there is no award for having kids.
From financial perspective, kids are very very expensive: people without kids, earning a little above average, have an ability to purchase yachts and second homes, at least in US.
From emotional perspective, there are people who never have kids and who are happy, there are people who never have kids and are considering themselves a waste of space, there are people who have kids and suffer every moment of every day (both kids and parents suffer), and there are people who call their kids, "my joy" and do all they can to be good parents.
The point of having kids is not to pay any imaginary debt to society or somehow contribute to that "...be fruitful and multiply..." or prove something to someone.
The purpose of having kids means that you are a balanced (mentally, emotionally, financially) person, and you want to bring a new life - and you promise to do your best to raise the child to be better than you.
It's an ultimate ego killer, if done the right way.
And it does require some mental preparation.
So, if the question is, "Do you want kids?" and your mind shouts, "No way!", then don't have kids.
Kids are the ultimate unknown, they can turn out just like you or they can become better than you or they can turn against you.
You know you are ready to have kids when you know that either of these options will not destroy you.
And until that happens, work on becoming the best person you can be - grow personally and professionally, learn, explore the world, and accumulate life experience: who knows, perhaps one day you will have someone to share it all with?
Be it your life partner or your child.
There's no set age where people feel they must have kids.
Some children, when they are little, talk about wanting to be parents. Some teenagers think about how they'll be better parents than their own parents. Some people in their 20s feel that clock tick and get into kids with great gung ho. Some in their 30s start thinking that they really should get started. Some in their 40s panic that they better do it now before it's too late. Some people start even later.
And like Stephanie Vardavas said, some people never feel the urge.
My extended community, including family, friends and current coworkers, has people who started as parents in their 20s, 30s and 40s. I think there are a couple of people who had kids in their late teens. And there are quite a few who never had kids.
If you never feel the call to be a parent, that is OK. It's not for everybody. It needs to be your choice to be a parent. You have plenty of time ahead of you.
- I have always wanted to have a family.
- I wanted to have kids before 30.
- For the people who usually want to have kids, most likely, go with ages between 25 - 30. But who really knows....
- A lot of my friends from high school and college started a few years after us.
- You might not ever have that need to have children. Plenty people do not.