Can someone really change others?
Well hello everyone....
This is my first answer on quora so please i request u all to neglect the mistakes..... :')
A person can only help you or can be the cause of you changing yourself but it can all happen only if you really wanna change yourself at your will....
I have experience it myself....
I had been a mad dude guy often everyday indulging myself in gangwars, michiefs and every thing a bad guy would prefer to do until i met that girl....the most shy girl capable of sitting in same posture with mouth shut for whole school hours....i used to keep looking at her sometimes and wonder how can someone be so silent :|
I dont know how and when i fall for her but im sure it had been the best memory of my life since then....the best and the most strange feeling i have ever experienced.....
Obviously she does'nt liked me due to my habits and i preferred to change myself just for her sake.....nd it was a good decision overall....
1)I stopped riding bike fast
2)Stopped roaming here and there
3)I stopped drinking smoking
4)Stopped fighting with people....i personally went to most of them and apologised for my behaviour
5)I started studying cause study and career was the only option that could make us together
6)I started to wake up early and attend coaching classes to get a glimpse of her <3
7)I learnt to care , I learnt the way of talking, i learnt the way of dressing, learnt to love people, to care for my parents....I learnt each of these just by observing her
8)I learnt saving and stopped being a spendthrift....I started preferring to spend my money on my sisters rather than on myself....
9)I started spending time efficienty and got more time to spend with my family.....
10)I became poet....i started writing poems for her :p
11)I started listening love and emotional songs over honey singh :p
1) I can add more of them and the details how these things influenced my life if you guys wanna know more....
2)I still love her and unfortunately we still aint together....hope we do someday :')
Can someone? Really????
Based on real life story...
It started raining heavily, Dad looked at the sky only to find to his bad luck, the dark dense clouds were showing no chance of break in raining.
With the sky heavily overcast throughout the day it looked like a rainy moonsoon day,but the spells of the rain witnessed by the city were due to upper air cyclonic circulation over the east-central Arabian sea
Frustrated dad took out a cigratte from his upper pocket and lit in hurry, he was furious over something murmuring under his own breath, he did not gave a shit to his 10 yr kid watching him with his wide eyes in surprise from behind a door, for him his whole world used to revolve around his dad, he was his hero.
Since the day his wife passed away after prolonge ill-ness, the dad was alone in company of his son and lots of debt, that he loaned for the treatment of his deceased wife for the cancer treatment, she was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2008 and after prolong therapy and sessions of chemotherapy she got rid of it, but for brief time after a year later, she was detected with cancer again and to add further pain she was detected with oral cancer after just 5 months later, they fought together for months and after fighting another couple of months they were loosing resolve, partly because they didn't have financial support and conventionally because she gave up on living, she died in agony.
Dad became alcoholic, he was dejected and depressed and used to spend all day cursing the god for making them go through hell - - still after fighting with all nerve, she left him for the after life. The only thing kept him alive was his 10 yr son, both shared a great bond.
He was bright lad, he would wake up every morning, get dressed for school and make his breakfast by himself, he wont speak much but was keen listiener, he was more mature than the kids of his own age. He held his nerve and decided to help his father get over past,the reason being they both needed each other.
Today: The cyclone
Son came out from hiding and sat in front of his dad in silence, he waited for his dad's attention, then pop out a cigarette from his pant's pocket and smoothly put into his mouth, his dad was watching all this in shock, the son lit the cigarette and puffed high in air like he was enjoying this new (like father like son) the dad was mute and in unbearable pain, he have never imagined his son would do anything like this, the son said in deep voice to his dad
Dad i miss mom,sometimes i miss her so much that i want to kill myself!
so that i could get to meet her, but i could not
because if i somehow managed to get to her i know i will never would get to meet you ever again
And i love you the same and i don't want to miss u....
But i am already missing my dad and i cannot meet him in person as he is himself missing *
So i choose this only cigarette to keep me company...
The cloud has stopped raining in this while and the city started moving into circles again...
Everything changed that day...the dad and son duo became best of there friends and lived a normal happy life thereafter...
Change is inevitable....
Weather you choose to change or not is upto you!
Only if they want to change. If they aren't asking for advice you'll only irritate them and make them dig in deeper to defend their way as the right way.
Setting an example is the best way to get someone to consider change. Most people won't believe something is possible for them unless they see that someone else has been successful at it.
One reason for this is because our brain is designed to protect our beliefs. Only when we are questioning the truth of our beliefs, or whether other beliefs would serve us better are we able to change them.
The rest of the time we interpret reality as if our beliefs are true.
I have significantly changed many of my beliefs and each time it was because I wanted to change it because I recognized that the existing belief was either not helpful or actually harmful to achieving my goals.
In general, the movement of my beliefs has been to one of a kinder, more loving world, putting peace in my own heart, and seeing myself and others as more empowered. I like my life a whole lot better after changing many of my beliefs.
Definitely, you can change someone but it requires a lot of PATIENCE.First of all you need to know what you want to change and whether this change is for his well being or your selfish motive.Human being have been gifted with the power to think and every individual wants to be happy and know what is good and bad for him/her but sometimes it takes time to realize and if you're benefiting him hell surely listen to you.You can play a vital role is fastening the process of realisation.The change you want should be for the betterment of the person and believe me if the person changes for good you'll be happier and your happiness would be priceless,you'll be happy seeing him happy.
Yes,change is a natural process if a person is greatly influenced by the other persons lifestyle, talk,intellectual and so on... But again it depends on the person if he wants to make move in changing himself.
Most of the time the answer is a big NO. That is most of the times. The change has to come from within. What we can do is act as influential people. How much you can change an individual depends on how much influence you wield over that person. The best examples of this are leaders. Hope this helps.