How to overcome the fear of failure

Summary

To put things in perspective, I created a resume of my failures. It feels depressing at first sight, but reminds me that there is a difference in failing at a task and being a failure as a person. It shows me that every time I wanted to succeed, I invited more failure in my life.

Education

  • Failed for 5 years in medical entrance exams. That is around 35 exams in total [Related answer here]
  • Finished 3-year undergraduate program in 4 years. Dropped one year
  • Couldn't get scholarship in NIFT, tried hard
  • Applied to 4 US Universities for MS, didn't get acceptance from the one I most wanted- Northwestern University

Corporate Experience

  • Was almost fired from 2 out of the 5 jobs I've held so far
  • Worked for free for 3 startups
  • Got rejected by Google once
  • Had 3 career breaks, each spanning a year [Related answer here]
  • Reached out to innumerable people on Linkedin to find a job in each of these years. Faced rejection 99.9% of the times- went through a very psychologically draining process [Related answer here]
  • Realized too late that I'm in a job I don't like - in my late 20s [Related answer here]
  • Broke my back to get a job in MNC post MS - gave more than 60 interviews (including initial discussions with recruiters)
  • In one of my earlier jobs, my supervisor once said, "If I had interviewed you, I wouldn't have hired you"

Health

  • Had slipped discs in lumbar and cervical region while running, at an age of 27
  • Had another in lumbar at 32
  • Can't run anymore
  • Gained 12 kgs postpartum [Related answer here]
  • Had serious face pigmentation after applying an expired face pack at age of 32. It horribly blighted my face for more than a year

Passion

  • Trying to write a book since last 2 years, couldn't find time to be persistent
  • Sometimes fail in Quora/blog writing commitments that I've set up for myself

Personal

  • Had zero confidence a decade back. Was shy to approach people. Was afraid of talking to authority. Career-wise wasn't doing good [Related answer here]
  • Suffered from stage fear my whole life. Never performed in front of an audience, not even participated in a fancy dress competition
  • Never got a single award/certificate in any competition I participated - writing, drawing
  • Tried learning Telugu (stayed in Hyderabad over 7 years), never managed to go far from okati-padi

I've failed a lot. But I also wanted to try things, and trying things comes with risk- one may succeed or one may fail. You sit for an entrance exam- you may pass it or you may fail. You apply to a foreign university- you may get accepted or you may get rejected. You give an interview- you may clear it or you may not.

But you won't sit for entrance exams, and don't stand a chance to pass, until you try. You won't apply to that foreign university, and don't have a chance to get accepted, until you try. You won't give that interview, and don't have a chance to clear it, until you try.

And that trying brings with it an equal chance of failing.

I welcome failure as a way of life.

To put things in perspective, here's my resume of success.


Summary

7+years experience in UX Research and Design. A good handle on UX Research methodologies. Great writing skills- frequent writer on Medium, Linkedin, Quora.

Education

  • Got 4th rank in UPTU MBA entrance exams. Was admitted to prestigious HBTI Kanpur. Left after getting a seat, lost non-refundable deposit
  • Cleared NIFT entrance. Got campus placed with first in-hand salary of Rs. 30,000 per month, which was a big deal a decade back
  • Got acceptance from 3 US universities, which includes names like Syracuse University, University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign
  • Got a 3.9/4 GPA in UIUC
  • Got fellowship after first semester, which is hard to come by in a MS program. Did a fully funded Masters with a monthly stipend of $1250
  • Couldn't make it to Northwestern but did a research assistantship under celebrated Dr. Neal Roese from Kellogg business school, Northwestern. The professor is famous for his work in Psychology
  • In retrospect, failing in medical entrance exams was a blessing. I thoroughly enjoy what I do now and the lifestyle that comes with it

Corporate Experience

  • After deciding to change my career field in my late 20s, got my first job in Microsoft
  • This job paid me beyond my wildest dreams
  • Since then, I have worked with Google, Flipkart
  • I get calls from top companies now, instead of me reaching out. Got my Senior Researcher role at Flipkart so [Related answer here]

Health

  • I keep myself fit by working out daily. I've worked out each single day since last 3 years [Related answer here]
  • Lost 14 kgs after gaining 12 kgs postpartum [Related answer here]

Passion

  • Have broken my book into multiple parts and have written 14 chapters so far, which feels like a great start [Related answer here]
  • I try to stick to writing one answer each week, and more often than not, succeed

Personal

  • I've a ton of confidence now. Can call it my lame superpower. I network like a pro. I have no fear of authority- I see higher-ranking officials as normal people like me, going through the challenges of day-to-day life. I feel passionate about my work and feel good about it.
  • Stage fear is a thing of the past. I frequently make presentations, speak in public, and in general, am not afraid to be called on stage anytime. I recently gave a talk to a group of 50+ enthusiastic audience. [Related answer here]
  • I still don't get awards/certificates, but I don't want them anymore. My perspective about them has changed. A sheet of paper or a glass trophy is the most worthless thing that can be given to recognize someone's efforts/achievements. They are the most useless things lying around. I'd return them back with a note ‘Thanks for recognizing my efforts. I'd have liked if I got something useful or monetary, which would remind me of my efforts everytime I used it. But alas! This trophy offers no functional value and hence I'm returning it," if I ever got one.

I've failed a lot. At a lot of things.

But I haven't failed as a person.


What happens when a narcissist can't control you?

The Narcissist will do one or many of the things below if your onto their bullshit and realize that they have no control over you:START A SMEAR CAMPAIGN AGAINST YOU:They will do everything in their power to put you down, demean you, destroy your reputation to other people. Especially the persons that you

How to lose 2 inches off my waist in 1 week

You can start a weight loss process but you have to wait for some visible results at least two or three months.Also, you can't lose waist inches easy.It's a process.So, 1, 2 or 3 months - it doesn't matter, just

As a restaurant manager, how do you handle a situation where the customer comes in and explains they cannot pay but really need a meal due to rough times?

This is a bit of a slippery slope. While we (restaurant managers) do have empathy, we also have our own bosses to answer to, and we have a profit to make. One the one hand, I'd rather a comped meal go to someone that needs it, but on