How to stop myself from loving someone again
Most people look at love and think that it's some uncontrollable emotion that runs their lives and can't be helped from feeling.
The thing is, you CAN actually choose who you love and don't love. For instance, say you're married and somebody comes along who's interested in you, or an old crush who's now currently available. you can choose not to fall into love with that person by setting boundaries on your heart and mind.
As for this guy, I would suggest you attempt to put boundaries on your heart and mind. Choose what type of guy you're going to fall in love with, and decide that you won't stray from that standard. I guess you could say you're setting up a type, and one of the requirements for that type should be that the guy likes you back equally to how you like him. If he doesn't, then decide you won't allow yourself to fall into love with them.
Also, it's important to avoid that person that you struggle with, and if you have to, convince yourself that you don't like/love him because of the things you don't like about him. You're better than that, and you have higher standards (respect yourself). Anything less is simply not worth your time and effort.
Shocker: People who fall in love want to fall in love.
When it ‘happens to you', that means you have already spent an inordinate amount of time fantasizing about that person. "I can't stop thinking about him" is a statement of lack of self control. There's nobody putting a gun to your head saying: "fantasize about him". If you feel you start fantasizing about anybody you can tell yourself "stop, I don't want this" and just don't do it.
What you can also do is make sure you are the first to arrive at the scene: go to a guy you like, ask him on a date, go on the date, and then, when you are getting familiar and things go well, allow yourself to fall in love.
It's a recipe for tough life I'm giving you, but it will prevent heart break. You decide what you want: indulge in fantasy and live with heart break, or live in reality and avoid it.
Oh but wait he can still leave you and break your heart later, there's no remedy for that.
You are not in love with this man. You are in love with the dream of him. That does not mean that the feelings you have are not powerful, but it's not love. It's called a crush.
You admit that you have never had a relationship with this man. You admit that he doesn't know that you are interested in him or that you would like to date him.
When you create a fantasy in your head about someone without letting them know, you are insuring that the fantasy of him that you have created about him can not die. It is an endless ‘love', but it's not real love.
If you want to stop yourself from falling for him again, tell him how you feel. The ensuing rejection will cure you of loving him. I don't recommend this method, but it will work if you really, really, really need to stop yourself from loving him.
First of all taking a life for someone who doesn't love you back is just not fair i mean its your life why should anyone else have control of that ?
and secondly i tried not falling in love too it just happens over and over again but in time you will know when not to fall for it and be wise about these things.
just meet your favorite friends a lot hang out with them more often spend more time with them if you have a dog even better go for long walks with the dog and try engaging your self in activities with your best buddies.
trust me this works although it takes a little time it works and you will then thank yourself for moving on from some one who did not love you back.
All the best and be happy.
Keep busy, busy, busy. Distract, distract, distract yourself.
You sound like you have invested a lot of emotional and cognitive time on this guy. It is time to replace that. Take care of you. Work hard. Play hard. Do something new. Plan a trip somewhere you have never been. Get regular exercise and eat healthy food. Volunteer. Read some good books.
This is how we all do this. The fact that you loved him shows you are ready for and capable of love. There will be someone else, but in the meantime -- take care of you and stay busy and distracted. It will get better.
There is no such thing as "love" except in romcoms and fantasy ‘literature'. It is a neurological chemical reaction thats there for mankind's instinct to procreate.
Cut all ties with the person and I guarantee after a period of time you will not care about the person and in fact find yourself bemused about the infatuation you had.