How to tell my adoptive parents that I want to meet my birth mother without hurting their feelings
I would hope that your adoptive parents had believed this time might come. Your desire would seem both natural and healthy.
Do it with love and with sincerity. They may well be uncertain or fearful. Take their fear away with respect and with the assurance that they are your parents by the effort, the time and the love they have already given you. No one can take that away from either of you, and you will not leave them.
Be prepared yourself for what you might find. Your mother gave you up for a reason. Either her inability to care for you or possibly even love you. Are you prepared for that? Be ready to leave her with love regardless of what you find, even if it is as simple as spending the time to get to know her.
You have a great blessing; two possible sets of parents. Love them both, favor neither and forget not what was given you out of love. Be honest with them and listen to your heart.
I wish you well
AW Stites retired CFP
Teaching Baby-Boomers to live an excellent retirement and helping them to learn to work online as freelancers.