Overthinking is ruining my life - to the point where I overthink myself out of living. Why do I do this, and what should I do? I do suffer from severe social phobia and depression and have been through severe abuse in my life.
This sounds like early onset of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. I suggest you visit a mental health professional.
If your thoughts are intrusive, unwanted or you are unable to dissociate yourself with subjects and topics in you mind and unable make good healthy conclusions and some good actions based on conclusions.
You find yourself pre-occupied constantly with thoughts which do little good for yourself.
You may be suffering from deficiencies, less vitamins, less salt levels (Sodium, Magnesium), sometimes improper protein synthesis to convert to serotonin and dopamine due to lack of amino acids in your body (gut).
How do obsessions occur? Why do they become compulsive?
Each action in our body on completion receives an acknowledgment from the performing organ through the neural network. Millions of such transactions occur. Each of our thoughts get converted into actions. If the acknowledgment is not received by the brain, it initiates the action again. Due to lack of neurotransmitters sometimes the actions do not pass a completion signal to the brain. The actions get performed several times and the brain continues to believe that the action was not performed. The brain gets into a repetitive loop.
If this happens for multiple thoughts the brain function can become extremely confused and stressed.
Did you know that OCD behavior (more profound aftereffect depression) occurs due to lack of protein synthesis by the guts (stomach). The body needs amines, vitamins amino acids to produce serotonin. This in turn increases the neurotransmitter levels.
Once you bring these levels to normal you would have gotten rid of both your OCD and depression. Serotonin re-uptake inhibitors (medication) can accelerate to reach required levels (at least a year) as the absorption is extremely slow naturally. After a year you can distinctly tell between the quality of thoughts before and after.
Its pretty unhealthy to have such a mind. This could happen at the onset of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). I suggest you visit mental health professional.
Hope that helps.