Which is better: a cold shower or a warm shower and why?
Well first off, good job on motivating me to publish an answer for the first time in actual months.
You say that hot showers are like masturbation and cold showers are like sex.
Cold showers and hot showers are just streams of water at different temperatures. They are not comparable to sex in any meaningful way. What we're really getting at here is whether hot or cold is better for you when it comes to showering.
Let me paint you a picture.
You get into the shower. You turn the knob and a spurt of freezing water hits your body. Any normal person will immediately freak out for obvious reasons. I mean come on. The cold water is agitating, and it makes you feel on edge. Eventually you'll get acclimated to the temperature, but by that time, your shower will most likely be over. It's unfulfilling and frustrating. You won't be more alert, you'll be pissed that your shower was so cold and probably want to hibernate under blankets for the rest of your life.
Now, imagine this.
You get into the shower. You turn the knob again, and pleasurably hot water comes out instead. The hot water relaxes you, and your muscles relax, just as if you were getting a hot stone treatment. Unlike cold water, the hot water is therapeutic and soothing. When you get out, you feel comfortable, not tired. You can get more things done because you had a good showering experience instead of the nightmare that is cold showers.
And if you do feel tired? Take showers at night. It's much better than taking them in the morning (who wants to get up that early?) and you can fall asleep after a pleasant showering experience. Easy.
If you want to turn the temperature down at the end of your shower, go ahead. But the water being cold from the beginning? That's heresy, plain and simple.
In my eyes, if you take cold showers, you're an alien or a masochist.