The problem indicated in this question does not depend on the choice between love marriage and arranged marriage.It depends on the FALSE EXPECTATIONS of people, and this factor of false expectations can apply both to love marriages and arranged marriages.So the solution is
If this question is asked for academic presentation, then this is not the forum to get an answer. If this is your personal question then, this looks a futile exercise to answer it rather this question raises more questions about the intentions behind asking it.If
Are Americans astonished to know that most Indians have arranged marriage with very low divorce rate ?
During my two plus decades living in the United States, I have seen many changes occur in my native India. The country eradicated the scourge of polio, sent a rocket ship to Mars on a shoestring budget, built modern highways crisscrossing the country, and flexed its economic muscles, raising tens of millions of people
There is a very famous line
Yes. They're pretty much the norm everywhere. Doesn't matter whether it's urban India or rural India, upper class or lower class society, rich or poor, north, south, east or west (north east might be an exception). If you know India only through Quora/Reddit or other internet platforms, you might assume that arranged marriages are hated by younger generation
Marriage in India is much more about binding families, and much less about personal choice and fulfilmentIndia remains a highly traditional society. Marriage is much more about binding families, and much less about personal choice and fulfilment, than in most other parts of
This is a very interesting question : ) A lot of people face this situation.Imagine you are very poor. And you have been taken to a garden full of melons. Big melons between small and small between the big. Sweet among
Seriously !Taking a decision to marry someone is not as easy as swiping right to a potential romantic partner on a dating app.Telling you by my experience - When you meet a guy, it is not hearts and flowers and fireworks all of the time. It is about living up to the strength of
Yes and no in America, which is the only country I can speak definitely about.When I taught a discussion-oriented class called "Theory of Knowledge", I had many NRI Indian students along with the others. One discussion that always came up, year after year, was 1)what can we "know"
It's a myth i have mentioned some pointsDue to financial problem and lack of good understanding leads to divorce for both love and arranged marriageNot really difference between love marriage and arranged marriageU r getting marriage to keep your parents happy which was selected from
The question of women working after marriage makes me sad. I and my father keep searching profiles in matrimonial site for a SUITABLE guy.I am a career oriented women and strive to support my family and myself. I am someone who works hander than anyone in the team(leave about the gender).I
Thanks for A2A.I will tell you both the sides ( Pros and Cons) of Arrange and love marriage.Lets Start with Arrange marriages:A person got into an arrange marriage and then later realise that it was not his/her cup of tea. The person
YES. it is highly practiced and more of a ritual in rajasthan, haryana, and near by states. I am keeping my answer very precise because i don't have much knowledge about other parts of india. Asi belong to rajasthan so i can guarantee you that husbands are purchased in various parts
No, I haven't met any groom in arranged marriage setup yet.So, is it a reason to reject a boy because he didn't talk much in first meeting?Think from a boy's perspective, maybe he has just no experience in this kind of meeting.He might be forced to meet you because his parents liked youHe was just feeling a bit
Marriages are built upon two pillars of attractions:Physical AttractionEmotional AttractionIn arranged marriages, the first factor is already taken care off since looks and physical features are the only thing that one considers before agreeing to marry someone. Therefore, even though there might not be emotional compatibility between the two in
Get admission in some educational course : In India women who are more educated tend to be the least likely choice of a Guy's family.I mean think about it....A woman who is more educated than her husband usually is not accepted in
In your question I read some admiration for your wife. She is smart and efficient. That's something.Please read carefully. You feel your live is empty. You don't feel any love coming from your wife and she most likely not from you. When
Typical arranged marriages doesn't happen like it happens in India, but there are cases where the prospects are from mutual families or friends and they give a word or arrange a meeting. There the boy and girl meet up if interested but that doesn't lead
Have you ever find your particular brand or cloth on that very day the day you out for shopping?Atleast it never happened with me. Sometimes it's not fit, sometimes colour, sometimes I thought let's try in other shop or brand. Shopping first time is always difficult because you are attracted to every
Be very sure that you are ready for marriage. It is a big deal, accept it.Gather as much patience as possible. You will need it.Do not hurry at all. Take one step at a time.With all the relatives and matrimony sites providing access to information of prospective brides, you have a good chance of finding the
As you mentioned " Strict Parents " it's difficult ... in some cases very difficult...The degree of difficulty depends on the person whom you love , religion , caste , looks , skin color etc etc ..If your Parents are against Love -
I would be amazed if he would not be convinced the moment you start talking about it. He already knows that you don't take care of his parents and that you never had sex with him. He of course figured out that you
How to tell my potential life partner that I do not visit places, which serve non-veg or alcohol because it is against my core values in an arranged Indian marriage
Well, it is tricky - not because your potential partner won't agree or might. However, how are you going to make sure that you only land up in vegetarian places? Places where alcohol is not served are plenty and I am sure you'll find them wherever you go. But you won't find easily spaces where non vegetarian is not
The Indian arranged marriage usually requires the jyotish to prepare the kundli before the marriage is considered. Such considerations are extraordinarily rare in the Jewish arranged marriage. I know the husband of one rabbi who is actually an astrologer, but I've never heard of chart matching taking
You can find your perfect life partner by addressing the 5 Ws – Why, When, Where, What, and Who. I am not going to explain "Why" as I am assuming that you are convinced about why you need a life partner in the first place. I
I can only share my experience. Mine was an arranged marriage, after a series of my failed attempts to make my various relationships work.My wife and me met in a restaurant, under the watchful and curious eyes of our parents and within half an hour of talking to each other, we both knew that we were good for
If I were going to move to India from the west after getting well-educated, would I be considered low-caste and how does arranged-marriage work for foreigners in India?
Drop the idea of caste. Don't think about it. If you can move to the West, go, become educated, and then go back and find someone who is educated enough to understand that the caste system is holding India back. If you have kids, don't tell them their caste.
its a good question!since we live in a culture-based country , love marriages are often not accepted by some traditional families. so people go for arranged marriages . the question is are they successful? unfortunately the answer is a big NO!also when people are
Certainly divorces are on the rise. Marriages on the other hand have become utterly materialistic. New found freedom of young Indians is going out of bounds. Elite youngsters who migrated to other countries have set up a competition for others
Is divorce still a big thing in India in arranged marriages? How do I get over the trauma of divorce?
Divorce is not as huge of a deal as it was before. But yes, it's continues to be a taboo.It is difficult to give advice about the situation without hearing the both of you out, but I do have some questions, have you tried sitting her down and talking to her? Have
Hello Truth Seeker,Namaste & Greetings from the island of Trinidad and Tobago.Thank you for your question on Quora. I will be delighted to contribute my opinion.Here's my response to your question:In various countries in and around Trinidad and Tobago, eg. Guyana, Suriname,
Is it right to check for horoscope matching for a love marriage? Does the protocol of astrology allow you to check for horoscope matching?
Yes, horoscope gives clear picture of how a person marriage and family life would be. Based on placement of 7th lord(Marriage), 8th lord(Spouse longevity), 2nd house(Family life) the person marriage life will be predicted.But if you already decided to go for marriage irrespective of horoscope matching then
Yes, in many ways love marriages score over arranged marriages.In love marriage:The prospective life partners freely choose each other, without others influencing them.They take their own time to understand each other fully before marriage.They make their life plans even before marriage.They take full responsibility for their
Nope , not at all.Westerners have very wrong notion about arranged marriages , something like people are pushed into it with no choice and you get to see your partner only on wedding night , and then having experience similar to one night stand with
In contemporary India, a married woman, by and large, is subservient to her hubby. Not only change of surname; but also entire name is changed, if their stars/planets are unsuitable. A lady doctor changed her name as JAYALAXMI TO [V]JAYALAXMI. Our ethos
Disclaimer: I am not a legal professional and hence please do not assume every word of this answer as perfect. I am writing what I have understood by reading or listening to people. So anybody who wish to correct me, feel free to use the Add Comment option.Assumption: First
What are the questions one should ask when meeting a guy for first time in an arranged marriage to know his thinking about various things?
While the idea of meeting your potential partner and their family may seem like an exciting idea, we know there's equal amount of nervousness along with it. First meetings are always hard – there's the stress of making a good first impression, of finding out if you
What effect do you think the arrival of hookup culture in India will have on arranged and love marriages? Will marriage as an institution survive in the future of India?
Surely there is a great change. Marriage is no longer considered a lifetime commitment. As long as the government does not take custody of children legitimate or illegitimate, many couples will be keeping their marriages for the sake of the children. But there is an unhealthy attitude of couples living separately and indulging in
I got married in 2013. Was 24 had just started working in a bank as a scale 1 officer. My parents had assured me that they were only
I got married this way and my marriage is a disaster and am living in a dead marriage. Unless you do not have a choice don't approach matrimonial sites. There are lot of things you can never understand about the person through matrimony sites (those things are crucial
I don't know if it is mindset of all Indian girls, probably not, but I can speak for a section of Indian girls.Looks : getting attracted to certain features in opposite sex is very natural. So there can be proposals where I get attracted to them or may be
Originally Answered: Is it true that arranged marriages, even in recent times, last longer than love marriages?I have no statistics to prove one way or another, so just expressing my opinion here:As I am from India- a conservative
According to the recent study, 69 percent marriages in India are arranged in comparison to 31 per percent love marriages.If you are looking for best matrimonial sites for arranged marriage, I would suggest you to try Marrily, matrimony application for independent singles..Sharing link for your reference: Marrily Matrimony App - Android Apps on Google Play
I wasn't planning to write an answer to this question until I read a few answers here where girls were accused are accused of judging a guy based on his pay package and in particularly this answer-Anonymous's answer to What should you
Choose a guy who will treat you with love, care and respect you wether you get such guy from love marriage or arranged marriage is fateIam giving some advantage and disadvantages of both as what I knowARRANGED MARRIAGEProsYou get to know a stranger and slowly fall in love with him and that
Original Post: Why are Indians so obsessed with marriages?As I see it, there are three plus two other reasons for the
I would say both arranged as well as love marriages are unstable in this generation.The problem is in both the cases. Couples who want a proper advice don't have good parents. Good parents are capable to give proper advice to their children but they are not willing.Thatswhy counselling centers are trending today.Let us discuss about the failure of
I like this question just too much.Yesterday I was explaining why love marriage is better than arranged marriage to a fifty year old uncle in a family gathering.He agreed to most of my points because I had very clear fundamentals about the topic although I have a lot to
Actually noone can gauge the success or failure of an arranged marriage in India. Hence, the presumption is not confirmed. Let me tell you about our arranged marriage.I was not sure of marrying. I did not have a stable career. I was
Yes and shamelessly. I have been in the marriage market for a year now, and below is what I have experience. (I have a B.Tech Degree by the way, no MS or MBA from US)Indian Girls born and bought up in the US, do not want Indian born and raised, but living in the US. (Fair enough as
Why do Indian parents support arranged marriages? Why are they so much interested in marrying their children to a stranger?
Till 70 years ago arranged marriage was with known family only ..there use to be some one in between knowing both family and both person.Even today proper verification is required and done during arranged marriage processMatrimonial profile ..most are misliding and no one
Why do many Indian groom's parents do not allow bride to have a job after marriage inspite of being educated? Do they expect the same from their own daughter?
It's not true. In 1987 I got married. I got a govt job within six months.My in-laws are the first people to tell me to join. My husband left it to me.My parents and in-laws both scolded me for not joining.Infact I was in need of money. I would get pension also after retirement if I
I don't know where you get the stats from, but India has largest number of failed love marriages. To get proof for that, go to the nearby court and see the number of recent divorce. My answer's data is based on the information given by lawyer in Pune.
Any subject in the hands of expert can do wonders, astrology is not an exception. In this case if couple ended in divorce after matching, it doesn't mean that astrology is defective. It simply mean that astrologer didn't looked at at consequences during matching.Most people including some naive astrologers think that horoscope matching is just
Because in general Indians don't decide for themselves.Right from the time, which school to study, which course to take, which profession to enter has considerations above the personal interest and choice.Then which brand of cycle to buy, motor
Why does an arranged marriage even work? Isn't it like a business deal where either a payment (dowry) is involved, or heavy word-of-mouth publicity (rallying round of family and friends)?
Hi Aditya Bhargava . Thanks for the A2A.Let me tell you a story.A young man in his early twenties joined a huge company and got his first posting in a small town. On the day of his joining, he met his boss who seemed like a jolly middle-aged man. He showed him around and gave him
Immediate dowry receipt. Why bother to get monthly salary when a full-time maidservant can come with ready cash?You won't believe I had posted a question on this topic and atleast 10 answerers have deleted their answers. Thankfully, 18 and my answer (total 19) are still there.Here is
Don't know about such a statistic, but even if it was there could be just one reason.Arranged marriages happen in conservative societies and such societies wouldn't accept divorce easily.I was married and went through pure isolation for 2 months. That's the only 2 months I was married. They would keep my food separately and assigned
These my personal opinions, and is NOT a legals opinions.I believe the divorce rates are higher because of the following factors:Our society has shifted focus from
Finished college? Get married.Got a job? Get married.I know the boy's uncle, same community! Get married.I saw girl's photo, she is beautiful, you will have good kids. Get married.Do you see a pattern? There are specific reasons for people to get married except that no one
I was just wondering the same thing. There are very few other animals that operate within the confines of this lifestyle. The rate of divorce has grown and is now around 53% in the USA and even as high as 71% in a less religious country like Belgium.It seems that living in this
8 misconceptions people have about arranged marriages1. That your parents want to get rid of you2. And thus, you are forced into it3. That the person you're marrying is extremely unattractive4. Or that the person you're marrying is an old rich guy5.
Be ready for the weirdest answer from my 7th pass 80 year old Granny's corner:Me: So Grandma, how on earth should someone judge a girl and her family in arranged marriages? It seems so weird- what should be the questions?Grandma: Are you absolutely stupid or pretending to be more dumb than what I
The problem indicated in this question does not depend on the choice between love marriage and arranged marriage.It depends on the FALSE EXPECTATIONS of people, and this factor of false expectations can apply both to love marriages and arranged marriages.So the solution is not enforcing a
After a couple of failed marriages my Indian friends claim arranged marriage is much better, how would I try that as I am not Indian (I am German, Swiss, and French American), is it as simple as moving to India for an extended period of time?
Most of the young couple are unaware of the intricacies of a happy marriage.Prudent to study intricacies of happy marriage/relationship/cohabitation, so that both of you can keep happy for life. Any glitch arising @ a later date can be tackled with ease.Details follow:WISH YOU [every prospective bride & groom] HAPPY, HEALTHY & PROSPEROUS REMARRIED LIFE*/EVER
Your parents say arranged marraige is better as they feel safe for us. They say they know what is right for us and who is right for us. They also want arranged marriage so that they can ensure that their children marry within the same cast and community.But is this really true? What is the garuntee that
Mine was an arranged marriage, after a series of my failed attempts to make my various relationships work.My wife and me met in a restaurant, under the watchful and curious eyes of our parents and within half an hour of talking to each other, we both knew that we were good for each other. We took the plunge
Are Indian girls open to marry a balding guy, who is successful in his career? Or in other words is balding hair a major factor in choosing a groom?
Why will any lady mind marrying such person?Baldness is not a disease or any weakness.It's just add to the physical look of the person same like dark or fair ,tall or short,fat or thin , long or short finger etc.We can find several people in society of such type and are married. I have not
Not necessarily.I have heard of some cases where the husband and wife, after a fight don't talk to each other for years. I have heard of stories about real marriages where the husband/wife was emotionally/physically abused but still never
Advantages:(1) Arranged marriage is generally accepted in our society as it lends creditability and social recognition for a secured conjugal life. The entire responsibility of the marriage is undertaken by both the parents.(2) In Laws adjustment is better in case of an arranged
My own experience with arranged marriage wasn't quite arranged. By parents. Or family.Maybe it was arranged by the Gods. Or the Internet. Or the Internet Gods.Sure, my former wife and I shared the same cultural traditions, spoke the same language and came from the same community in South India.Although it felt
I ain't interested in gold diggers or family of gold diggers.Well actually, my current salary (10.1... soon it'll be ~12), doesn't attract gold diggers either :(Arranged marriage is either for uncle ji (who couldn't get/bother any/about GF) or highly experienced men (womaniser); because you'll get highly experienced women
Good nature is like Oxygen, good job is like solid food and good earning potential (not job) is like water.You can't live happily if any of the above three are not present. However, now you could figure out the order of preference ! You can sustain for really long time without a good job. But without
This is a very interesting question : ) A lot of people face this situation.Imagine you are very poor. And you have been taken to a garden full of melons. Big melons between small and small between the big. Sweet among the sour and sour among the sweet.
Arranged marriages are reducing. Is it a threat to our culture? Can children be allowed to choose their partner beyond caste,considering the failure rate of love marriages?
The children you talk about , if over 18 years of age are consenting adults.The children below can't marry or you can be booked under child marriage.Now coming to the question, I am a person who chose love marriage over arranged. These are
Two reasons:Fertility: one of the main objectives of an arranged marriage is procreation. A younger bride ensures a longer fertile period and a better chance of having kids. This does have something of a historical baggage. In the past, infant morality was high and families tried to have as many
As a 30-year-old Indian man, do you prefer an average looking girl in the IT industry, or a gorgeous girl working in the modeling industry, for an arranged marriage?
Let's be honest here, no average Indian would want to get into a long term relationship with anyone from entertainment industry, unless you're from the same industry. Some people can't even cope up with people working in IT.Reasons are pretty simple: As
As an Indian did you have a courstship period before marriage and engagement in an arranged marriage setup?
Yes.. We got to know each other before marriage. Such things were impossible three decades back.I met my in laws and my husband in my college hostel, in March. There was a gap of 6 months in between this and marriage. My parents were abroad then. So
As an Indian female about to meet guys for an arranged marriage, how do I know if they are ok with non-virgins without asking them straight up?
Don't worry at all regarding this. You don't have to ask questions or try even to know that. The guy will be way more interested to know about your virginity than anything in the world and seriously I'm not joking around. If the guy is a true gentleman then you can expect the subject after 10 minutes of
Being an Indian, I am opposed to arrange marriages. What are your experiences with arrange marriages?
I also belongs to traditional Indian family, I got married by arranged setting. When I was a teenage girl, many girls had affairs and had boyfriends. They were enjoying at full swing with their boyfriends, I felt that I was alone and I wanted to have a boyfriend but suddenly I thought that my
A2AMaybe!Its not a yes or no answer because when a society or a community is involved you cannot answer for the entire community in one word. People are different and so are their thoughts or their views. Love marriages
No. And there's a good reason for that.Normal marriages:You see someone, you like them. You date them. Get to know them a bit. Dream of life with them. You compromise for them because you love them. They do the same for you. You get over things like education, work and money because
Yes dear. Go through the following reasons :About 95% of Indian marriages are still arranged marriages. Al the Matrimonial Websites and thousands of marriage bureau in the country in each and every city are running only because of arranged marriages. Arrange marriages if done with prior
No it doesn't work at all.In India even if a girl is unhappy, being phsycially and emotionally abused by her husband and in laws, she would either think about killing herself or compromise because of the prevailing cultural taboos.A divorced girl is looked
Yes, we did. After introductions and due process from both parties, it took us a year to get married. So we had our share of meeting on the sly, long talks on the phone, exchange of cards and after a certain comfort level was achieved on both sides, the sensual side of things started. Began with non-veg jokes and
Do love marriages last longer than arranged marriages? My parents' divorce made me lose hope in arranged marriages, but they want me to do an arranged one.
Let it be love marriage or arranged marriage it depends on their charecter and attitude all the problems start when we fall short in money matters it's very tough to run a family after marriage.both partners must Co operate each and every matter and treat equally good understanding down to earth is very important to lead good journey.
Nah!I for one find arranged marriages really strange. How can you decide to make a guy your husband in a couple of dates, when you won't even ideally make him your boyfriend in the same time frame? Everyone is on their best behavior in the beginning.The whole idea is very superficial & business-y IMO. I think dating &
Do you believe that kundlis are important for match making and mangliks should be married to mangliks only?
You know people who do not know of their birth date or time are much better from getting trapped into this, seriously.Once you get this manglik stamp, you have to fight against so many people if you wish to marry a person of your choice who is non-manglik.Though India, This carry a
Does arranged marriage bind one to fall in love with the person to whom one is married, and stop looking for love outside of the marriage?
India is one of the nations where maximum number of marriages happen through arranged set up. In many cases people do fall in love eventually and in many other cases they do not but they remain together. People who remain together in the marriage in spite of absence of love may indulge in cheating, extra marital
Have you decided to marry someone you weren't sure about (in an arranged marriage) ? How do you feel about your decision now?
I will be of marriageable age in three years.The thing is I am a single guy even after turning 18+. I am in my 20s. If I have to settle down in life, I don't know what other option I have other than
In an arranged marriage, first few years of the marriage are spent in knowing and understanding the person. There is a sense and demand of spending more time with each other.In a love marriage, before the marriage, the couple shares a very different level of understanding. This understanding when tied to social obligations expected once
Character of any person is defined by a lot of attributes. For some drinking is lack of character, while for others it is not. For others, being sarcastic is offensive while for some it may not. So, you got to decide what you absolutely hate in a man's
How to choose my life partner 'wisely' under an arranged marriage set up so that I could not regret later in life
I am in the same boat, and frankly I am terrified of making a bad choice . I don't know if I end up in good situation or not , but I have a few suggestionsvand insights , which might hopefully help youThis is one of the most important decisions you
Typical arranged marriages doesn't happen like it happens in India, but there are cases where the prospects are from mutual families or friends and they give a word or arrange a meeting. There the boy and girl meet up if
A2A!!Whenever this question comes up in your arranged marriage set up, tell him that "You would prefer living separately rather than with in-laws and you are not against living with them and that would be your secondary choice."After you tell him this, you need to inquire first what does
I would be amazed if he would not be convinced the moment you start talking about it. He already knows that you don't take care of his parents and that you never had sex with him. He of course figured out that you don't like him, and he probably knows that your parents don't
Hello,We are Cupid Knot, one of India's most trusted matrimonial network for all castes, religions, and communities. At Cupid Knot, we ensure that you find your life partner who is compatible to you in every way. We offer exclusive, first-rate services that
MARRIAGE CAN LAST FOR LIFE, PROVIDED BOTH ARE AWARE OF INTRICACIES/PITFALLS OF HAPPY MARRIAGE.Most of the young couple are unaware of the intricacies of a happy marriage.Prudent to study intricacies of happy marriage/relationship/cohabitation, so that both of you can keep happy for life. Any glitch arising @ a later date can be tackled
Straight answer could be noWhen you will make excuses.. There will be a bad impressionTalk to them straight forward. State your opinion regarding it.. First talk to your parents. They are the one who could manage this situation.. First they might feel bad. But later
How to tell my potential life partner in an Indian arranged marriage setting that I don't want her to wear short/revealing dresses in case we plan to get hitched
Don't do that.You should't impose anything on her. If you try to do so, it will harm your relationship in long run. So ask her what is her choice clothes, allow her to take that decision herself. If she is matured enough, she will know what and where