The problem indicated in this question does not depend on the choice between love marriage and arranged marriage.It depends on the FALSE EXPECTATIONS of people, and this factor of false expectations can apply both to love marriages and arranged marriages.So the solution is
If this question is asked for academic presentation, then this is not the forum to get an answer. If this is your personal question then, this looks a futile exercise to answer it rather this question raises more questions about the intentions behind asking it.If
Are Americans astonished to know that most Indians have arranged marriage with very low divorce rate ?
During my two plus decades living in the United States, I have seen many changes occur in my native India. The country eradicated the scourge of polio, sent a rocket ship to Mars on a shoestring budget, built modern highways crisscrossing the country, and flexed its economic muscles, raising tens of millions of people
The question and its description clearly shows some grave misconceptions that you have. Unfortunately, many people share the same thought.First of all, please don't think that people go for arranged marriages after getting rejected lots of times. In fact, such cases are really rare and there is a huge number of
There is a very famous line
Mine was an arranged marriage, after a series of my failed attempts to make my various relationships work.My wife and me met in a restaurant, under the watchful and curious eyes of our parents and within half an hour of talking to each other, we
I don't agree to the opinions stated. In my view, arrange marriages can be durable that too with loads of happiness if we make them work. Nowadays our parents take your opinions into considerations, we get some time to spend together before marriage, we do have a choice
Of course arranged marriages are safe.In Astrology, marriage is seen from the house of Libra, that is symbolic for relationship, listening, relationship of give and take and matrimony.Just imagine, you are thinking of a Libra matter, which is ideally done after
Yes. They're pretty much the norm everywhere. Doesn't matter whether it's urban India or rural India, upper class or lower class society, rich or poor, north, south, east or west (north east might be an exception). If you know India only through Quora/Reddit or other internet platforms, you might assume that arranged marriages are hated by younger generation
Marriage in India is much more about binding families, and much less about personal choice and fulfilmentIndia remains a highly traditional society. Marriage is much more about binding families, and much less about personal choice and fulfilment, than in most other parts of
No. Members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints don't arrange marriages.I've heard that the Kingston clan, also known as the Latter-Day Church of Christ and the FLDS, both of which are small polygamist offshoots of the LDS Church have experimented with arranged marriages. But I can't confirm that. And neither
Mormons aren't really a single culture. The
Arranged marriages have been an integral part of the Indian society since time immemorial; a marriage, where two strangers take the sacred vows, and commit to each other, to spend a lifetime together, take along the entire family in their journey of life, and start a
This is a very interesting question : ) A lot of people face this situation.Imagine you are very poor. And you have been taken to a garden full of melons. Big melons between small and small between the big. Sweet among
Seriously !Taking a decision to marry someone is not as easy as swiping right to a potential romantic partner on a dating app.Telling you by my experience - When you meet a guy, it is not hearts and flowers and fireworks all of the time. It is about living up to the strength of
As a 24 years old girl, soon to be pushed into an arranged marriage, should I just accept that my husband would someday fall for another woman and make peace with it?
From where will you get this kind of ideas??This is called negativity. Even in your guessing you can't see positiveness?Anyway you don't know, what surprises your life will bring. Then think of rainbows instead of jolts.There is a story. A man full of negativity asked a pandit . I want to offer a flower garland
Hi,When we indulge in an institution like marriage, what could be bigger transformation than accepting a commitment for whole life. When we talk about marriage, Roles of husband and wife could be best served, with mutual understanding and more of respect to each other, far beyond love.Meaning of every definitions seems changed,
YES, A hindu man can get divorce.But you have to give strong reason.According to law, There some things in-spite you put divorce file against her.INFERTILITY, CHARACTERLESS, AVOID DOMESTIC WORK specially not serving husband. Medically proven any fatal disease, which cost more than he can arranged, Sexual diseases like AIDS.These are the only reasons, you can get
After reading this story, I would definitely say yes!*I Married a Stranger*I was on the bed, feeling terrified. I opened my diary and wrote, ‘I married a stranger' and quickly hid it under the bed. My whole body was shaking.
Yes, they exist.Some are forced, e.g. parents taking their daughters to their ancestral country then telling them they're getting married. I've heard of several cases of this happening.Others are voluntary. I used to have a couple of neighbours who'd met at university & been living together ever since. Then one day I
Yes and no in America, which is the only country I can speak definitely about.When I taught a discussion-oriented class called "Theory of Knowledge", I had many NRI Indian students along with the others. One discussion that always came up, year after year, was 1)what can we "know"
It's a myth i have mentioned some pointsDue to financial problem and lack of good understanding leads to divorce for both love and arranged marriageNot really difference between love marriage and arranged marriageU r getting marriage to keep your parents happy which was selected from
It is called blind dating. There's no interference (if you want to call it that) by parents and you have to find a spouse for yourself. This puts tremendous pressure on people after a certain age because nobody wants to be seen as a social leftover. In India,it is called arranged marriage. Arranged marriages are
I can't speak for everyone else. I am not married yet, and I don't think I ever can. And the reason is my parents whose marriage is going to be 25 years come January: the marriage which is the most terrible one.India is a place where matches are made in
Do children born to parents in love marriage get more love and affection from both parents as compared to parents who had an arranged marriage?
NO.........IN love marriage ,there are more commitments before marriage.as no one is perfect and able to fullfilll all your desire, there is dissatisfaction after marriage and even force them to think over their choice.now there is less expectations in arranged marriage, as
The question of women working after marriage makes me sad. I and my father keep searching profiles in matrimonial site for a SUITABLE guy.I am a career oriented women and strive to support my family and myself. I am someone who works hander than anyone in the team(leave about the gender).I
Thanks for A2A.I will tell you both the sides ( Pros and Cons) of Arrange and love marriage.Lets Start with Arrange marriages:A person got into an arrange marriage and then later realise that it was not his/her cup of tea. The person
YES. it is highly practiced and more of a ritual in rajasthan, haryana, and near by states. I am keeping my answer very precise because i don't have much knowledge about other parts of india. Asi belong to rajasthan so i can guarantee you that husbands are purchased in various parts
What exactly is a Kundali? What all can it say? Let's first see that and then you decide till what extent it would work for marriage yourself.When you are born, you have a body type. Some foods would be good for you, some might create allergies. Your DNA and genes decide
It's insane actually, the kind of things they claim can be known from the planetary positions.There is sufficient evidence that the practice is a needless step to stop you from marrying an ideal partner.A close friend is going
Yes...to some extent.....But i am happy with the situation...cant do anythingThe reasonsShe is more focussed on her family. Daily 6 hours talkShe told me after 6 months of marriage that , she feels like she is now married.Our interests are different-likes and dislikes also.According to me not so romantic.Like to always fashionable...but never..always in maxiRepeated discussion for
It depends on both individuals not on the marriage. If a love marriage is done due to greed of money property luxurious life then love marriage can be also a nightmare. If arranged marriage is done with mutual understanding and emotional compatibility then arranged marriage can be also a best. But unfortunately now a days
Marriage, arranged or love marriage, is a sacred bond and readily acceptable by society. Failure ratio in marriage in India is still far more low, as both the parties put their utmost endeavor to make a marriage work. Remember the fact that
Yes. I met a girl in a regular community gathering who seemed nice and then asked my parents to
No, I haven't met any groom in arranged marriage setup yet.So, is it a reason to reject a boy because he didn't talk much in first meeting?Think from a boy's perspective, maybe he has just no experience in this kind of meeting.He might be forced to meet you because his parents liked youHe was just feeling a bit
DowaryDowary is main consideration in Marriage and that is only possible when Marriage is arranged.I have number of cases where boy preferred and selected girls profile..but he will say to girls parents to talk to his parents...pay at cash counter. Bring with coupons..Even in cases where the girl is senior and fee increments more..it is beyond boy and his
Marriages are built upon two pillars of attractions:Physical AttractionEmotional AttractionIn arranged marriages, the first factor is already taken care off since looks and physical features are the only thing that one considers before agreeing to marry someone. Therefore, even though there might not be emotional compatibility between the two in
One of the main ingredients of any successful marriage/relationship is Honesty.Honesty means being truthful, doing the right thing and not telling lies. Connecting with others in an honest way is vital: this is what builds trust, the key element for making the relationship strong.However, we must ask ourselves,
Get admission in some educational course : In India women who are more educated tend to be the least likely choice of a Guy's family.I mean think about it....A woman who is more educated than her husband usually is not accepted in
Are you really convinced that there is no hope left for your marriage to improve? If your relationship with your spouse has gone sour, then the best way to end the bond is by seeking a divorce. But divorce should be your last option. You should seriously consider it only if your marriage been plagued by continual
You didn't provide much information but I do want to encourage you and give you hope. I have seen marriages that appeared completed deal brought back to life and those couples are more in love today than ever. When we trust our relationships to God, He can work miracles. Marriage
In your question I read some admiration for your wife. She is smart and efficient. That's something.Please read carefully. You feel your live is empty. You don't feel any love coming from your wife and she most likely not from you. When
It is a very set process in India. As soon as a girl / boy in the family turns marriageable age, uncles / aunties in the family get active and start suggesting suitable prospects. This is followed by mostly checking the kundali's or astrological charts of the prospective
Typical arranged marriages doesn't happen like it happens in India, but there are cases where the prospects are from mutual families or friends and they give a word or arrange a meeting. There the boy and girl meet up if interested but that doesn't lead
Have you ever find your particular brand or cloth on that very day the day you out for shopping?Atleast it never happened with me. Sometimes it's not fit, sometimes colour, sometimes I thought let's try in other shop or brand. Shopping first time is always difficult because you are attracted to every
Be very sure that you are ready for marriage. It is a big deal, accept it.Gather as much patience as possible. You will need it.Do not hurry at all. Take one step at a time.With all the relatives and matrimony sites providing access to information of prospective brides, you have a good chance of finding the
As you mentioned " Strict Parents " it's difficult ... in some cases very difficult...The degree of difficulty depends on the person whom you love , religion , caste , looks , skin color etc etc ..If your Parents are against Love -
I would be amazed if he would not be convinced the moment you start talking about it. He already knows that you don't take care of his parents and that you never had sex with him. He of course figured out that you
R u talking about rejecting this particular girl or any girl in arranged marriage.1.If it is this specific girl, then it should be easy for you, while talking to her , don't give any hint to her whether u like her or not. After 1-2 days, when
How to tell my potential life partner that I do not visit places, which serve non-veg or alcohol because it is against my core values in an arranged Indian marriage
Well, it is tricky - not because your potential partner won't agree or might. However, how are you going to make sure that you only land up in vegetarian places? Places where alcohol is not served are plenty and I am sure you'll find them wherever you go. But you won't find easily spaces where non vegetarian is not
The Indian arranged marriage usually requires the jyotish to prepare the kundli before the marriage is considered. Such considerations are extraordinarily rare in the Jewish arranged marriage. I know the husband of one rabbi who is actually an astrologer, but I've never heard of chart matching taking
As to whether an arranged marriage is better than a love marriage is pretty much up for debate.Because, there are many arranged marriages today ending up in divorce. One of the biggest differences is that in the past arranged marriages were mostly set-up via family, close friends
You can find your perfect life partner by addressing the 5 Ws – Why, When, Where, What, and Who. I am not going to explain "Why" as I am assuming that you are convinced about why you need a life partner in the first place. I
I can only share my experience. Mine was an arranged marriage, after a series of my failed attempts to make my various relationships work.My wife and me met in a restaurant, under the watchful and curious eyes of our parents and within half an hour of talking to each other, we both knew that we were good for
It was 1971. He and his elder sister came for arranged marriage meeting.After usual questions of education etc, my father proudly said
If I were going to move to India from the west after getting well-educated, would I be considered low-caste and how does arranged-marriage work for foreigners in India?
Drop the idea of caste. Don't think about it. If you can move to the West, go, become educated, and then go back and find someone who is educated enough to understand that the caste system is holding India back. If you have kids, don't tell them their caste.
its a good question!since we live in a culture-based country , love marriages are often not accepted by some traditional families. so people go for arranged marriages . the question is are they successful? unfortunately the answer is a big NO!also when people are
There can be different views. Here are two of mine:By getting married, you gain a social safety valve.A woman gets a social safety valve after marriage, for protection against the constant nagging and pursuance, which is done by the society itself.Since I was a child of five, I was constantly reminded by my cousin brother...
In India what percentage of arranged marriages end in divorce and what percentage of love marriages end in divorce?
I was unable to find any specific numbers on the distinction of "arranged" vs. "love" marriages, as Indian law does not mandate you to register love and arranged marriages any differently from each other. However India has the highest success rates for marriages (only 1%
Individual opinions differ. I believe a difference of about 2-3 years should be ok. But a difference of 7-8 years is too much. And I don't understand why guys of your age are not available. Did people stop reproducing for a few years before you were born?This is subjective, but I
Both – the love and the arranged marriages – have their merits as well as demerits and marriage is a decision of lifetime. Though families are involved in most of the marriages, yet it's the couple who has to live together for lifetime. So, the decision to choose life partner should be left to the
As to whether it is prevalent or not in America largely depends on statistics which most like have not been produced in any kind of detail.However, wherever there are collections of South Asian communities living in a different land, arranged marriage will still be part of the custom.Especially, for those who are from the native country, like India. For
This is how an arranged marriage workflow goes in India.First, families get each other contacts and agree to talk after applying below filters in majority of cases,Same religionSame castSame subcastNo close relativesDecent family backgroundSame or higher financial statusGuy/Gal height, weight, color, facecut, hairstyle, tatoo style etcHis/her Smoking, drinking,
Certainly divorces are on the rise. Marriages on the other hand have become utterly materialistic. New found freedom of young Indians is going out of bounds. Elite youngsters who migrated to other countries have set up a competition for others
Is divorce still a big thing in India in arranged marriages? How do I get over the trauma of divorce?
Divorce is not as huge of a deal as it was before. But yes, it's continues to be a taboo.It is difficult to give advice about the situation without hearing the both of you out, but I do have some questions, have you tried sitting her down and talking to her? Have
Hello Truth Seeker,Namaste & Greetings from the island of Trinidad and Tobago.Thank you for your question on Quora. I will be delighted to contribute my opinion.Here's my response to your question:In various countries in and around Trinidad and Tobago, eg. Guyana, Suriname,
There's one thing you and, apparently, half the people that use Quora and like astrology, should learn:astrology is a tool. It's not a law, a set of rules, an official document, a government officer. It's a thing we use to fix other things, to do certain tasks, and, when we're not using it, it should remain, well-oiled
Is it right to check for horoscope matching for a love marriage? Does the protocol of astrology allow you to check for horoscope matching?
Yes, horoscope gives clear picture of how a person marriage and family life would be. Based on placement of 7th lord(Marriage), 8th lord(Spouse longevity), 2nd house(Family life) the person marriage life will be predicted.But if you already decided to go for marriage irrespective of horoscope matching then
Yes, in many ways love marriages score over arranged marriages.In love marriage:The prospective life partners freely choose each other, without others influencing them.They take their own time to understand each other fully before marriage.They make their life plans even before marriage.They take full responsibility for their
If the boy or girl is extremely short with compare to other, it looks awkward and people usually do not prefer it for arranged marriage. I was asked to meet a prospective boy for my cousine's marriage. My cousine is nearly 5'5" and the boy was not even 5' although his bio data claimed
My uncle recommended a guy for an arranged marriage, we both saw each other but didn't talk. Should I wait for the guy to first ping me, or being a girl, is it fine if I message him first?
The marriage is a very important decision. If you two dont talk with each other then how will you get to know each other? I know that you are a girl,but theres nothing wrong in initiating the talk. You two should talk with each other to get to know each other. All the best.
Sometimes it is enough to vaguely describe certain aspects of our past when too much detail would cause pain to those we love. But we should make an honest attempt to share our story, our personal history, the good and the bad with our significant
Should tradition in general be banned? No. But we can still disagree with it. We can't ban arranged marriage, but we can say that we don't like it. And if noone comes to like it (and there is not this tradition stuff), then OK.Still, here comes a counterpoint: if
Nope. Marriage is such an important bond between two people.My wife and I got to the point after 11 years of our marriage that we could have just thrown in the towel too, So many things creeped into our marriage. Slowly, we stopped communicating and started
I would say yes and my whole reasoning is that , someday sometime in the future things would become known. If the trust breaks then, its pretty hard to start afresh. Its better to start on a clean state from the get go.But
Nope , not at all.Westerners have very wrong notion about arranged marriages , something like people are pushed into it with no choice and you get to see your partner only on wedding night , and then having experience similar to one night stand with
To anyone living in America, Europe or Canada etc, would you ever consider an arranged marriage? Why or why not?
A2AI think that I mentioned this before, but I 100% would if I were not engaged.When you're in school and in the early days of building your career, it should be spent focusing to improve your foundation for a successful life later.But in western countries, we spend that
Mine was an arranged marriage 40 years back. I met her in my relative's house and she was not aware of the purpose of meet. It was a casual discussion. She was more fluent in Malayalam than Tamil and my case was reverse. Yet, we communicated and it was
What are some of the successful tips for arrange marriage? How should a wife gain trust and love from her husband?
Trust is something which does not come fast or easily. It comes over time and with commitment. Trust is like a plant which will grow stronger and bigger by time.Few things which will help you gain trust is by - Sharing (Time, Experiences, Past and future expectations)Being committed to the one you are married
Advantages of Love MarriageBoth individuals decide that want to be together and don't let the others get involved in their relationship.You are marrying someone you know already and are responsible for the relationship.You can settle into matrimony easily since you are aware of
In contemporary India, a married woman, by and large, is subservient to her hubby. Not only change of surname; but also entire name is changed, if their stars/planets are unsuitable. A lady doctor changed her name as JAYALAXMI TO [V]JAYALAXMI. Our ethos
Arranged marriages are still common in India. Its really a challenge for most of the couple to get a consent from their parents. Most of the disagreement of parents are based on caste, community, religion , etc. So, based on my experience because mine was
Disclaimer: I am not a legal professional and hence please do not assume every word of this answer as perfect. I am writing what I have understood by reading or listening to people. So anybody who wish to correct me, feel free to use the Add Comment option.Assumption: First
The most damaging cause is untreated mental illness. Living closely with someone who is undiagnosed with bi-polar disorder, or has extreme anxiety, clinical depression or psychosis of various kinds will often drive people out of a marriage when it remains undiagnosed.It's true that finances and the stress of family can lead
What are the questions one should ask when meeting a guy for first time in an arranged marriage to know his thinking about various things?
While the idea of meeting your potential partner and their family may seem like an exciting idea, we know there's equal amount of nervousness along with it. First meetings are always hard – there's the stress of making a good first impression, of finding out if you
Not once, but I have been rejected by innumerable families for just one reason for part three years.I'm a single daughter to working class parents. My father is a government employee who is nearing retirement. My mother gave tuition to school kids, but stopped years back due to throat problems. I'm a B.Tech+MBA, working
Won't you feel uncomfortable in sharing a room with a person you hardly know?In arranged marriages this phenomenon happens for the 'REST OF OUR LIVES'(if we assume no divorces are gonna happen).Being a male, I might
It can be a good idea to start talking about future goals you have for yourself. Seeing if your goals line up is very important. Also, this opens up the possibility of supporting each other in the future.Get to know each other's hobbies
The idea of the arranged marriage is something that has been prevalent in societies virtually everywhere for the longest time.Arranged marriages account for the overwhelming majority of marriages in India - up to 90% of marriages there.For the rest of the world, arranged marriages account for up
Communication and common courtesy (remember to say 'please' and 'thank you' and 'excuse me' when you burp or fart or have to blow your nose at the table).It helps if each partner believes s/he got the best of the bargain.Each partner should do some little thing every day to induce the other partner to
My experiences as a 27 year old male in one of the major metropolitan cities in India.With a couple of bad first 'dates' with two girls shortlisted by my parents and me, I figured I needed a strategy to sort this
What effect do you think the arrival of hookup culture in India will have on arranged and love marriages? Will marriage as an institution survive in the future of India?
Surely there is a great change. Marriage is no longer considered a lifetime commitment. As long as the government does not take custody of children legitimate or illegitimate, many couples will be keeping their marriages for the sake of the children. But there is an unhealthy attitude of couples living separately and indulging in
Going anonymous because it's about a fraud profile on a matrimonial website.One word: Terrible.The entire business is full of two-faced frauds. It's a terrible place to be for a girl (especially), who becomes the target of perverts that come in all shapes and sizes over there.So only a month back my parents opened my profile on Bharat
In most of India, a husband is a surprise gift from your parents.It can either contain your favourite things or have a hungry rat that eats away your soul, slowly.A husband for a few lucky people, is the best friend you sleep with, someone with whom you have the most fun with, someone who
I got married in 2013. Was 24 had just started working in a bank as a scale 1 officer. My parents had assured me that they were only
I was in 3rd year of engineering when my parents decided to look out for a girl with whom they would marry me by the time I am done with my engineering.In my life I have always believed that whatever happens in your life happens for good. So I went with the flow without giving
I got married this way and my marriage is a disaster and am living in a dead marriage. Unless you do not have a choice don't approach matrimonial sites. There are lot of things you can never understand about the person through matrimony sites (those things are crucial
R2A..I do not have the exact data and statistics but in a discussion about divorce, a senior lawyer quoted about a Divorce counseller, who were specialised in bridging the rift between husband and wife and resolved 99% percent of the cases
I don't know if it is mindset of all Indian girls, probably not, but I can speak for a section of Indian girls.Looks : getting attracted to certain features in opposite sex is very natural. So there can be proposals where I get attracted to them or may be
30 may be 3-4 yrs late if you want two kids. If a man marries at 30, he will be father by 31-32. After that 3-4 yrs gap is necessary if 1St birth is Caeserean. Means 2nd child by 35. When you become of 58 , 2nd one is just 23 and yet to settle. If