Am I being abused by my mother?

First of all: We don't have enough information to advise you properly. Try to find someone you can talk to about this in more detail - a counselor or a relative. Would you confidently diagnose someone's description of stomach pain over the Internet? This is just

Can a 14year old shower with his mother?

When you get a sunburn if you apply vinegar all over your body and shower it off with hot water as quickly as possible, it won't hurt and peel. But it must be done quickly. We only have one shower and waiting for someone to use it first doesn't work.

Can a mother in law destroy a good marriage?

It's not about good marriage she is capable of killing every marriage. It can love or arranged no one can stop. Mother in law will always teaches her daughter how to take control of his husband , how to create fights between his

Could a guy who had multiple affairs in the past be a trustworthy husband?

Do this yourself. Make a survey of cases on extramarital affairs. Look at how many people involved were

Did your parents get divorced?

No. They have been happily married what will be 54 years this October 24, 2017.They share religious views, moral standards, and economic responsibility.They own a working cattle ranch, that has been in my father's family since 1903. They share frugal habits.They have only had ONE argument in front of their children in all these years.

Do introverts make good father/mother/husbands/wife?

It's not based just on introverts. Actually, introverts can also be of many types. They could be brooding types. They could be artist types. They could be kind types. You know what I mean? So, the introverts which are not 'the

Do parents really love all their kids equally?

A better question would be do parents like each of their children equally, and for many of us the answer is no. Children have different personalities and interests as do their parents. Some combinations mesh better than others. So a parent may feel more comfortable with one child and have more interests in

Do parents treat boys and girls equally?

Well my parents tried to for a very long time. Until the so called society decided to put it's foot in between. To be very frank, my childhood was pretty great. I was allowed to do what I want, play tennis in whatever clothes I wanted

Do people become more happy or less happy after marriage?

I can tell about my situation.I have been married for more than 5 years now and I feel that my life before marriage was much happier and exciting.Before marriage :Never had sex. Never had a girl friend. Believed that, after marriage, I will

Do you avoid marriage because your parents got divorced?

No!I'm my own person. My parents divorced and my mum is forever saying how marriage is bad and how ‘all men are horrible' blah blah blah.When I was younger, I believed her and then I met my partner. We have been together 4

Do you consider your mother-in-law as your mother?

No.I would give man's perspective (can't be generalized though). It's my true story. I am married for almost 16 years. At the time of marriage my economic status was quite low compared to my inlaws, but since I had graduated from one of top

Does staying in a joint family increase the chances of divorce?

You have this question coz divorces are highlighted quite frequently and less people focus on the positive stories involving inlaws and the newly wed bride.Let's take both the cases one by oneYou believe that your would be inlaws are crooked and will spoil you life from the very beginning. They will spoil it in any case if they are

Family Relationships and Dynamics: Are there topics which you cannot discuss with your spouse?

Yes, but not because of friction. My parents are a bit nuts and sometimes say very hurtful things about my wife for no apparent reason. She knows that this happens, but I keep the specifics from her and try not to

Family Relationships and Dynamics: How do I deal with my in laws?

You need to make this your boyfriend's problem, but you also need to find a way to allow yourself to be emotional in front of your mother-in-law to be. If they both see that you are upset or crying and still don't change- leave. If you bottle everything up then you will

Family Relationships and Dynamics: Why do brothers change after marriage?

It may be due to several reasonsNothing really has changed and you are just feeling a bit ignored as he is married now and has to give time to his wife as well. Chances 20%Maybe he is having a bad relation with his wife and takes the stress out on you or other family members. Chances 20%His wife was

How a mother in law can be a good mother for the daughter in law?

A mother in law can treat her dil(daughter in law) as alike her mom.It requires some time, maybe some days or months. Who knows? If she is getting along with her dil very well from the beginning of marriage of her son.A

How abnormal is my family relationship?

What you described in your post is dysfunctional family behavior, so I'm sorry to hear about how you were treated and want you to know that your father's behavior was highly inappropriate.However, I must share that it makes so sense that you're asking what you did to offend him when he directly addressed

How can an asexual female from an orthodox family in India avoid marriage?

Get admission in some educational course : In India women who are more educated tend to be the least likely choice of a Guy's family.I mean think about it....A woman who is more educated than her husband usually is not accepted in

How to become free of my mother's control without hurting her feelings

First off you should not feel guilty at all as your mother should have cut the apron strings quite a while back. Although you are living at home you are still an adult and should be able to make your own decisions. I know with

How to convince (Indian) parents to let me marry an older woman who is divorced

Belive me you will never be able to convince your parents because Indian parents cant take any risk. They have to walk on the pre-defined roads i.e arranged marriage. Even many of arranged marriage are full of dowry violence,domestic abuse, immature spouses, unrealstic expectation

How to convince my husband that I don't want to become a mother

The first thing that you need to ask yourself is is this really about your career?Lots of people want to have children, lots of people don't want to have children. The main difference between them is that society approves of the people who want children, and often does not approve of the people who don't.So

How to convince my Indian parents to let a black man marry their daughter

Very difficult for me to answer as a parent myself. I dont need convincing, you should be sure of yourself and your relationship.What I would like to say is that Parents typically do not wish ill for their children. They act out their insecurities when their kids want to go in directions

How to get along with difficult family members

I would like to say there is a simple answer to this, but there isn't. It all depends on what is going on - and why.The best advice I can ever give you, is to continually look into your heart and

How to get my husband out of his brother house

Ask.You do not state which culture you are from or he is from. Some cultures live routinely with or very close to extended family members or even immediate family. In some cultures, women are EXPECTED to live with and join the husband's family household, to share common labor and housekeeping.You may discover there are

How to handle my husband, who is too attached to his mother

Its a very common phenomenon. After marriage,mother in law becomes very possessive and her son becomes over defensive, and they tend to forget the new person has her own sets of values and capacities. Wife's never wants their husbands to get into

How to parent my own parents

Well, just show him the brighter side of life.Tell him that you always wanted to spend your free time with him. But you never got a chance since he was busy at work. It shows that you still want their love.Having said that, start playing indoor games

How to stay away from my husbands family but not push him away from them

Tricky one as they are also your family. Be polite around them and when you are focus on the good points about them. No matter how badly behaved someone is there is always at least one good quality about them. If you continue to think about how much

How to tell my adoptive parents that I want to meet my birth mother without hurting their feelings

I would hope that your adoptive parents had believed this time might come. Your desire would seem both natural and healthy.Do it with love and with sincerity. They may well be uncertain or fearful. Take their fear away with respect and

How to tell my wife I want a divorce

I don't think you want a divorce. Things sound pretty good overall (in fact, better than many marriages), and if you work through this, you'll be fine. However, that doesn't stop the feeling of being overwhelmed by frustration at this behaviour of hers that causes

How to treat my irresponsible father

With love, with respect and with caution. Do not put yourself in the position where you depend on him for something important if it'S likely he will mess it up. Can you trust him with your car? Can you tell him to pick up your kids from school early? Can you rely on him to turn

How can my wife and I balance our time together when we have our own apartment but have families to take care of who need us almost every day?

You didn't mention what part of the world you are in. I suspect it may not be North America.You and your wife will each need to talk to your families. You need to let them know that you care about them, and want to help them, but that you can not be with them every day.Even in cultures where

How can one deal with toxic family members?

There are two ways you can deal with them. Its an example from how my family is.1- You can either completely cut them out of your life.2- Keep talking to them, and supporting them. They need more help then the average person. They are not well. They suffer and hurt

How can we deal with parents who are not supportive regarding your dream?

I have been unfortunate to be one of those people that had a dream and aspired to make my mark on the world in an Artistic way but was told I wasn't good enough by a parent figure. I was accepted to a University in New York when I was quite young and offers were made

How to get away from abusive parents

Go to the counselor in your school and ask this question. If you do not have a counselor at your school then go to your teacher or any administrator and let them know you are being abused at home and seek their advice. Generally they will contact the

How did your child's mother react to a custody order that was ruled in favor of the father?

A little background history:I am an American and living in Germany for more than 30 years. My wife is a German citizen, but originally from the Ukraine. She has lived here in Germany for almost 18 years.5 years ago my wife decided that she did not want to be married

How to convince a guy whose parents rejected me

Please don't convince him. If he really loves you he'll convince his parents for you. And please do not marry against yours and his' parents will. Would you like if your kids the same to you in future. The best way would be that he tries to convince his own parents

How to convince my baptized Sikh parents to let me marry an American guy

Some times what we see and feel is correct is not correct for others. Same is happening in your case, what you see as good (Marrying a guy of your choice), is not a good idea for your parents.And to understand this you have to be a mother of a young

How to convince my parents, I need a divorce

You are an adult and don't need your parents permission to get a divorce. It's a decision that only you and/or your husband can make.It is respectful to inform your parents that you are divorcing, because you are their child and they love you and want you to be happy with your life. Speak to

How to convince my parents that I should get a divorce

You're an Indian I'm guessing.You are legally an adult. You don't need to convince your parents you need a divorce. You just should engage a lawyer and file for one. With what you're saying you can file complaint for domestic abuse also.Your parents are not the ones living with the torture, you are.

How to convince my parents to let me marry a divorced guy

Looks like you have almost made up your mind, and are searching for support what you have decided is right and want to move ahead with it.You seek marriage not a married life with someone whom you fell in love and it feels like you cannot even tell

How to convince my parents to let me marry a divorced man who is 20 years older than me

How much does your relationship to your parents matter to you? Are you willing to loose their respect, their support, their involvement in your life. Willing to accept that they'll criticize you and likely give you harsh words for it (and perhaps more).

How to cope living with my mother

It sounds like you two have bad communication,  which is not rare at all.  Thinking ahead to when you will be moving out in a few years instead of focusing on living with her you might focus on making it fun or enjoyable as it is only

How to deal with a bossy and rude mother in law and with my mommy's boy husband

I think one way to begin is to identify what MIL is doing and saying. Call her right out on it, calmly, but firmly -

How to deal with a bossy mother-in-law and 3 sisters-in-law who are married, but still interfere a lot on daily matters

Thanks for A2A.It is just like any other political struggle to control the power, power to control over family or the husband,who is incidentally a Son and brother too.Who wins ? Someone with sharp acumen, patience and skills to strike at right time and at appropriate

How to deal with a bossy mother in law

A2A.This is a challenge presented to you that if you make it through, will be significantly valuable to your self confidence and self authority.She is overstepping her boundaries big time...duh....: (This is unacceptable. First consider this to lay out the playing field. She is making the

How to deal with a husband who disrespects my family

Me and my mother had faced similar experiences. So I would like to share my opinion. I will not advice you to 'talk' to him, because its common sense that you have tried all the methods (and apparently failed) before you decided to post a personal issue on this platform. Besides i believe that your husband

How to deal with a terrible father

I know exactly what you are going through but believe me you have plenty of options . its your life and you should have it your way.most people donot really want freedom because freedom involves responsibility and people shy away from responsibility. you should think of moving out of your house. you must be aroun 23

How to deal with an insecure mother-in-law

Why is your mother in  law feeling insecure? Mostly mother in law feel insecure when another person comes into her child's life. She is terrified she might lose her dominance.Mother in law - Why is she the most feared?Make her understand that you would never intrude into her

How to deal with an irresponsible father

You don't deal with him.You step up and take all the responsibilities.Take this as a golden opportunity.Someday you will be in his place and you have to take up the responsibilities which you are talking about.Suppose your team lead is irresponsible and your manager wants a new new lead from your team,

How to deal with an overbearing widowed mother

If ever there were a reason to talk to a social worker or family therapist, this is it. Your mother needs to be in social situations with people who can become friends. You may need to make her cooperation a condition of giving her further help. No one is as effective

How to deal with my demanding elderly mother who insists on staying in her home but can no longer take care of things

My brother and I told our mom that we would help her to stay in her own home until it started causing problems in our lives.This may sound selfish on our part to some people. We both lived several hours from

How to deal with my stubborn father

Hi Isa sorry its took me a long time to answer :(Sorry to hear its a frustrating time, father's have to be protective, supportive, caring and there for you at all times, it sounds like he's scared, hurt no one is listening, which makes him mad, he thinks he's right, he blames you and your mother

How to deal with neglectful father

I'm sorry you have a terrible father who abused you physically and continues abusing you emotionally (even though the physical abuse was apparently in the past). I don't know your age but it is not too late to go to authorities and confess the secret you have been keeping. You may not want to

How to get over bad memories and bad relationships

First things first, we Quorans would like to assure you that a lot of people go through this kind of thing; so you're never alone in any of this. Also you have this big, wonderful community to help you be a better person. That's some

How to handle my brother who keeps asking me money

You just say no, hang up the phone. He is a grown person, and you are not his parent. It doesnt matter if you are a billionaire, he is owed none of the money you have worked hard for, it is for YOU and your family. So if he doesnt want to work as hard as

How to handle my financially irresponsible parents who keep asking me for money

I think your focus is in the wrong place. It seems like your focus is on your parents. If you take your focus off your parents, the problem is much simpler: Get away from them.The focus you have is normal in crazy families: the children hover around the parents, frustrated, but still enabling them.Parents who are this dysfunctional are

How to handle my mother-in-law who is one of the most wicked mother-in-laws in India, without hurting my husband

I have read your comment. I can understand your pain. This is Indian scenario where Mother always thinks she is more superior than her child. and this case become more prominent in the case of daughter in law. I am also seeing the same problem. As last if you try to avoid her and give reaction, relation

How to help my sister, her husband left her for her best friend

So her friend settled for playing 2nd fiddle?It's irrelevant who he left her for, and I do not blame the friend for accepting him into her life, this happens sometimes, you can't blame or accuse either of them if that's where their hearts were, good luck

How to politely tell my mother in law she is overwhelming me with her gifts for a house we are still moving into

First question I have is how long have you and your spouse been married?While my answer is predicated upon a long marriage, I think, with some tweaks, it will work for short marriages also.First, invite your MIL to a small cafe/restaurant.Just the two of you (This is VERY

How to stop yelling at my kid

Well, I think most parents can relate to losing their cool from time to time with their kids. But that's great you want to address this issue.So, as far as some ideas on how to reign your temper in, try taking a step back

How to survive an abusive father

shit.. i had it bad, but not this bad.This is a hotline for parental abuse in the USA and canada, if you are neither in the USA nor Canada, find a local hotline. They will advise you better than me.Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline1-800-422-4453What you must prepare for is to leave the

How to tell my husband that I'm pregnant with his brother's baby

You need to tell your husband as soon as possible because the longer you wait, the more trouble you will make. You need to just straight up tell him face to face that you cheated on him with his brother. He deserves and you will give him all of the details of your

How to tell my mother in law to stay away from my baby

I'm guessing your baby is very young. Being protective and possessive of your newborn is normal as you get to know him or her and develop confidence in yourself as a mother.While you may feel that your baby belongs to you, your child

How to tell parents that I got married against their wish

Congradualations. Maybe a letteR explaining all your reasons. And the wonderful things you see in your mate. Also be sure to tell them that they did a great job raising you, you have a good head on your shoulders for

How to to cope with an evil mother-in-law

I'm sorry to tell you this but you don't have many options at all. Actually unless your partner is on board with you on this and stands up to her you have no options.Me and my husband moved 3 states away but her influence didn't weaken. She meddled in our marriage. Bitched constantly and

How do mothers-in-law destroy marriages?

The role of mothers-in-law in marriages, constructive or otherwise, has significant cultural underpinnings.I will answer from the Indian cultural context and include both mothers-in-law (husband's mother and wife's mother), as is the right things to do, in my assessment.Husband's mother:Competing

How to cope with an overbearing mother-in-law

How I deal with an over bearing MIL. Hmm..My MIL is very passive aggressive, if you don't do things as she would, you're doing them wrong. My husband and I are both in our 50's, our children are grown with families of their own so she doesn't tell us

How to cope with terrible in-laws

Coping with toxic in laws not only shatters your mental peace, and married life but also professional and social as well.Terrible in laws never respect the boundaries that every relationship should have.they are intrusive, you will have no personal space they will get into everything and if you try to ignore

How to deal with a narcissistic mother-in-law

My MIL has many of of the signs of being a covert narcissist, how I deal with her is that I basically stay aloof to her. Gray rock method. Don't react to the things she says or does, likely she is looking for a reaction from you (or anyone really) to ‘confirm' the things she dislikes, her

How to deal with a passive-aggressive, manipulative mother

One of the most difficult things to deal with in life, is when a close family member (especially a parent) is destructive to you.Another particularly difficult thing, is when someone simply doesn't acknowledge their own role and accountability in a

How to deal with an emotionally abusive mother

THIS IS WRITTEN BY THE SAME GIRL WHO ASKED THE QUESTION- I am choosing to go anonymous for many reasons. Here are details that may help others answer the question. Please take some time to read over it.I am a 17 year old sophomore in college and have lived with this

How to deal with emotional abuse from those closest to you(e.g. family members)

So, like most things there isn't a one size fits all answer. It is a good beginning to really know that abusive behavior is never about you.  You NEVER deserve to be abused.  I have been dealing with this all my life.  In the end

How to deal with emotionally abusive family members

i cant seem to add to this, then others brainwashed me too into thinking my fmaily were good people and there to help me. For years ive been dancing this dance. They want to be 'above' me and have everything

How to deal with your mother-in-law living with you

When I saw top answers, I wanna laugh! You people are so naive!It all depends on what a person your mother-in-law is. If she treats you like a daughter with love, there will be no problem whatsoever! But if she sees you like an enemy who took her son, she still hate you and will continue picking on

How to even begin to forgive a family that disowned & shunned you years ago

I got sage advice from a counselor: forgive slowly.Whether you stepped in or not during the health crisis, whether walked right away again, after, matters not to *you*.In their minds, you may ‘owe' them - there's no unconditional love, there's some weird form of bookkeeping, some weird

How to get your husband to stop being a mommy's boy

Loving and caring for one's mom doesn't make one

How does it feel to be raised by sexist parents who favour their sons over their daughters? How do sexist parents treat their daughters around the world?

This is not my story but my mother's. She was born in 1966 in the South of France, to a family from the

How does it feel when your mother calls you 'useless'?

As you could imagine.It feels like a stab to the heart.To have the word useless yelled directly at your face feels like a kid excited to use the electric pencil sharpener, they jab it in the pencil gets torn to pieces and becomes even sharper.My mothers called me that and a bitch plenty of times. And

How does one deal with a controlling father?

A controlling father is not necessarily an abusive father, but an abusive father is also usually a controlling father.  A helicopter father may be overprotecting his child, but he may doing so out of a misguided concern for the child's safety.An abusive father has little concern for the

How has a mother-in-law offended you?

It's been 6 months now that I got married. It's an arranged marriage. I am 25 and husband is 28. I work in IT company and my husband is working in Public sector. My husband is very understanding and takes care of me.In our courtship period she created a big issue between me

How has the divorce of your parents affected you?

It's rather hard to attribute aspects of one's personality to a singular circumstance. I will therefore be quantifying the effects in terms of the relationships that I have - or haven't - formed with the people around me.My parents had been bickering for as long as I can remember (the earliest memory

How much does your mother and father's divorce impact you many years later in life?

My parents divorced when I was around 3 years old, my sister was ten.Disclaimer: I am fortunate enough to have two respectful parents with regards to who has the right to parenting, my dad has always been forthcoming with financial aid, he paid more alimony than necessary when he experienced affluent periods and helped her

How should husbands treat their wives?

If I can be permitted to twist this question around just a bit: If husbands treat their wives as they should, they would become truly great husbands.  So what makes a great husband?The Boy Scouts of America defines a great husband

How should I convince my mom to let me marry a divorced woman?

In my opinion, you need to follow your mothers direction. A long time ago at church I visited with two single women in the library and they told me about a single guy that married a divorced woman with two children.

How should I convince my parents to let me get divorce from an emotionally abusive husband?

Hey there,I exactly know what you mean. Been there, done that.I am a family person. The cutlture I come from doesn't support divorce/ separation. My mom (I lost my dad at a young age) is a business women and single handed got us four siblings married and ‘settled' as it is termed in my home

How should I convince my parents to marry a divorced girl? She is girlfriend from my college days. What should I do?

Why do THEY want TO MARRY a divorced girl? just kidding. How old ARE you? how long ago WAS your last connection w/this girl? WHAT happened that you 2 broke up? Is SHE the one advancing for a reunion w/you-IF so, WHY? (does

How should I deal with mother-in-law problems?

My problems with my Metro Goldwyn Mayer lion my (Mil) are different. Not dealing with her. Dealt by her.Don't think you can learn to deal your Mil. You can't learn and write exams lifelong till your end. Let it go! Ignore. Experience teaches you to become wise.I tell my experience.1.House

How should I deal with my ignorant father?

Do you have to engage?Do you absolutely have to set him straight?It always takes two to tango.Take yourself out of this equation (don't be available when he wants to enlighten you) and suddenly you have all this time to be productive, be with your own thoughts (meditate?), be with

How should one convince his parents for marrying a girl who is a month older than him?

Hi,I think age in Indian society is particularly considered to be maintained with a certain difference where males being elder in most of the cases. So it is highly a traditional and cultural aspect rather than any calculations or logics on maturity levels. Now I suppose that

I am an Indian woman. How do I convince my parents to let me marry outside of my race?

I am happily married to a British guy now.I never had a type. I just wanted to feel loved. I would consider a person, when my body and mind said 'this is crazy'. I was attracted to guys. Period. I trusted my biology, chemistry, and physics when I am attracted to somebody. I gave myself

I don't get along well with my mother-in-law. How can I improve our relationship?

These tips apply, of course, only if your in-laws aren't actually abusive, or dangerous, or so malicious that it's just not possible to be around them. Assuming that they aren't quite that horrible, here are some points to consider:1. Remember the mere exposure effect. It turns

I don't want kids but my wife does. What should I do?

This is an oddly relevant question you asked me - I am in the same boat your wife is in, so I can talk to you from the woman's perspective.I knew before getting married that my husband didn't like

I don't want my husband in the delivery room when I give birth. My husband respects my decision but my mother in law doesn't. Now she's sending rude texts to me and arguing with my husband. What can I do?

Tell her she had her children, now you will have yours. Let her know that you consider it odd that she would intrude on someone's personal and intimate choices especially since she was not asked to be involved. You all need to carefully consider how pushy and

I don't want to live with my parent-in-laws, but my husband can't live without his parents. How to persuade him to shift?

Run; run far, and run now. This situation and he himself will never change. I married my now husband 9 years ago and we have been together for 10; in those 10 years it has ALWAYS been him and his family, what is best for him and them, what will make THEM happy, or him happy, and FUCK ME

I hate my mother as she shouts at me every day for anything possible. Am I wrong for this?

Don't hate you mother. She loves you more than anyone even if she shouts at you , sit with her and spend more and more time with her and tell her how you feel . Yes she definitely loves you the most. I know it's hard

I'm pregnant and my husband is forcing me to let his parents in the delivery room, but I don't want that. What should I do?

I had my son before I was a certified nurse midwife. My parents were 13 hours away in my home town and my boyfriend's parents were annoying as hell (the dad was a straight up pervert who used to stare at and comment about my boobs when I was breastfeeding, which led me to breastfeed in my